Writings

Titleless

My love, I’m so sorry for the
pain to you that I have caused.

I’m so sorry for the time
because of me that you have lost.

I’m not sorry for what I am,
I’m not sorry for my nature,
I just hope that you have found
some things in me that gave you nurture.

I wish for every single person on this planet
to feel as loved as I did, by this sun-attracting magnet.

May everyone feel this kind of love,
may the people count their blessings,
the ones that found the things above.

-16th 2026

Where is your shyness your highness?

-15th 2026

my Body is prepared to feel everything (no shhh it has the practice),

but my Mind isn’t,

and my Heart doesn’t really care,

because it’s non if it’s business anyway

-14th Oct

Pathological narcissism split between two people is called love

-18th Se 2026

Thursday

I feel like I let go of all the hands that used to hold me.

Empty, sad, weirdly enough I feel numb at the same time, but I’m guessing that’s the meds.

I don’t want to be alone, even though that’s the reason I left home.

I have so many things I want to do, and learn, and experience, and at the same time

I can’t even find a good reason to move, or stand up, or to sit down.

I literarily have no idea where to put myself nor what to do with myself.

I know that for something to flourish this chapter needs to end,

but it’s not easy getting used to walking around the world without, someone holding my hand.

But knowing it will be fine. That I will be fine, stopped helping to be honest.

I know what awaits is great and beautiful, but I’m dealing with right now.

How do I deal with right now?

There is nothing to deal with to begin with.

I’m already doing everything that needs to be done. I care for myself, I work out and I shower,

I eat and I sleep well, I go on walks, and I call my loved ones every day.

I study for exams, and I make my summer plans.

I paint and I go swimming when I can, to what cause, Iii.. don’t really understand.

I do it cause there is nothing else for me to do.

I knew it was going to be hard, so I just stopped trying not to fall apart.

So, I let it in, we take a breath, and I let my shadow take its steps.

There is no known terminology to explain, but it’s like living both in happiness and pain.

-16th 2023

My darling, nothing is black and white, de Facto. And it’s up to you whether you see grey or a rainbow.

– May

“The law = REASON – PASSION” (Aristotle)


“PASSION – REASON = Addiction” (A.B. Vidovič)

-2023

Let your angels go to hell. Because every experience counts.

-8th 2022

This month made me see that I am exactly where I need to be.

Thank you life for loving me.

-26th Se 2026

Can somebody be addicted to their anxiety?

-2026

A lie that is not far from the truth but is far from reality

-2023

You’re on your own train alone, but it doesn’t matter because it’s a good train. You have the whole train to yourself, so do what you want, and enjoy your ride.

-17th 2023

My Mind

I have to tell you that the power of my mind when it is not attacking itself, is downright fascinating.

Whether it is my mind that’s expanding or just the universe listening, I do not know.

But things that I ask for just ‘boom’ fall in my lap, and not to mention I’m back in my creative flow.

I was making myself worse, revelling in my insanity, and swimming in my pain.

Then one day something just clicked, and I realised I needed to close this Pandora’s box that I’ve opened, if I wanted to make myself sane.

I know that I’m not ok, I’m honest with myself now… my delusion stayed in 2023.

but I’m happy.

I’m happy because I care.

I care about how my body feels, and I care about what is going to make it hurt.

I care for my reactions, and I care for how I handle my emotions.

and I love the fact that I convinced myself into caring, because not much time since then has passed,

and it seems like the universe is giving me hug, and the mind thanking me for let it rest.

I’m happy, even if my mind is not healthy.

and that’s ok, because I’m ok

(guys, let’s hope it stays that way:)

-8th 2024